Coup-coup-ca-choo

I am the walrus...coup-coup-ca-choo......

That's what Brian Cashman is running around the Yankee offices proclaiming today. Why? Because he managed to steal a couple of pennant race impact players from the Philadelphia Phillies for some fair minor leaguers who aren't ready for prime time, and a little of the financial breathing room in his wallet that reads "Bad Mother F*&^er". I think he got that wallet from Samuel L. Jackson for his birthday last year. That's what I call a coup.

Everyone keeps fretting about what Bobby Abreu can't do, when they should be more worried about what he's going to do for the Yankees. He can't play defense like Torii Hunter in his prime. He can't hit for power like Mark Mcgwire on Andro. He won't run headfirst into the fence to catch a ball.....(neither would I). So what. Let's look at what he does....

He sports a career .411 OBP which means he's going to be standing out their on the basepaths when his hulkish teammates come to jack balls into the right field seats. He's going to go first to home on a bunch of gappers to the deep part of Yankee Stadium. He's going to work counts into the 10 pitch range like a handful of his other OBP gifted teammates and knock out starting pitchers early so everyone else can feast on the bullpen scraps. (The caption on this picture should read, "My boy is wicked good. How do you like them apples Boston?)

He's going to hit a bunch more home runs, because his career averages tell us he's going to. He will hit a bunch of them into the short porch in the midst of a late summer pennant race. He's going to step into right field and stay there for the duration of the season so we don't have to think about what to do every bloody night. His acquisition also allows us to put a few guys on the bench that belong there and can contribute in pinch hitting or spot start situations. Thanks for the effort Bernie.

Cory Lidle is another part of the equation that solves big problems. He's not meant to be a frontline starter for the Bombers. He's just going to eat innings and keep the ballclub in the game so we can steal a few with the bats. He's an upgrade over Chacon, Ponson, and maybe even Wright.

All in all, Cashman has produced big for the Yankees without giving up anything of real value. He may not be done either. Rumors continue to swirl about pitching coming to the Bronx. Keep your eyes and ears peeled boys and girls. The ride may not be over.