Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Neanderthals of Red Sox Nation

I know I shouldn’t be, but I’m amazed at the classless rabble of Red Sox fans that would boo a player as important as Johnny Damon was to the 2004 Champions. Let me amend that statement to say that I’m amazed that they booed him right away.

What kind of ungracious, boorish, and forgetful people the Neanderthals of Red Sox Nation are. Neither could they find it in their hearts to thank Johnny Damon for contributing mightily to their only World Series Championship in 86 years, nor could they keep from spewing nonsensical bile from their respective cake holes. Lest they forget, take a look at the picture at left and tell me that you'd be able to enjoy that trophy without the monumental contribution of your shaggy former lead off man. I just don't see it happening for you with Coco Crisp and Mark Loretta hitting 1-2 for you Beantown Bozos, so I don't get the hostility.

I’ll try to put myself in their shoes. Derek Jeter’s contract is up. The Boss thinks he’s past his prime and the asking price is too high. Jeter sees a chance to make his last contract count for the Red Sox and makes the move. I’m pissed. That damn traitorous bastard. I’m going to boo him…..But wait. He was the Yankee captain. He helped my ball club return to glory and contributed to 4 (or more) titles, plus a couple of Fall Classics where we came up short. We won 8 (or more) straight division crowns and made the playoffs in every year of his pinstriped career. Maybe I ought to give him a standing ovation, before turning my back. At the very least, I’ll sit on my hands, close my eyes, and imagine him in a Yankee uniform one last time. After that, everything is fair game. If the sight of Jeter made me sick, I’d boo. If I truly felt he should have taken less money to sign with the Yankees, I’d boo. If I felt he should have found a 3rd team to pay him his money, forgoing the hated Red Sox, I’d boo.

But, from the get go? Talk about short memories. Talk about turning your back on the best thing that ever happened to you. I’ll tell you why they booed Damon. Part of it is the Yankee-thing, but the bigger part of it is pain. They know they need him. They know he was crucial to their success, and now he’s going to help the Yankees succeed. It’s like having Halle Berry as your girlfriend and treating her with ambivalence because she wants you to marry her. When you hesitate and she finds someone who will commit, you regret it and lash out. That’s why they booed.

Beyond all that, there are many less knowledgeable Red Sox fans, be they drunken caustic frat boys or bitter old wash outs, that define their very fandom by being anti-Yankee. Why else would a brand dedicated to Yankee Hating come into existence and strike such a chord? The Yankee Hater apparel sells fairly well, but I can only imagine a person so twisted with self-doubt and a sense of worthlessness wearing something from the unfortunate line of clothing. No doubt there were more than a few of these pitiful wretches booing Johnny Damon. They’re idiots, but then again Damon was one of them too…an “idiot”. Now he’s our idiot, and he’s going to help us get back what’s ours…..the World Championship.

I hope we go on to whip the Red Sox this season, and I hope he hits .400 against them the rest of the way. They’ve turned their backs on him, and it’s time for him to do the same. He’s a Yankee, so be the best “Damn Yankee” you can be Johnny.

1 comment:

Mike Plugh said...

So he said it. How many things has Manny Ramirez said over the years? Athletes on every team say stupid shit all the time.

Rarely does one guy help to define a moment in history for a team like the Sox as Johnny Damon did, and first time back he can't get a courtesy applause. It shows that there are more Red Sox fans out there who define their entire existence by hating the Yankees instead of cheering for their own players. Idiots.